Of the many things that I planned to do with my life, sitting at home writing blog entries was definitely not one of them. I am still wary of going out and having fun with friends or just hanging around at shopping malls. It’s just not me. I prefer the loneliness of the home and the quiet privacy that a book can bring about. In short I am not a people’s person.
I was not always like this. I had a childhood during which I rarely kept my mouth shut. I was even termed as “Jet” because of the speed at which I used to talk. I was in a hurry to express what I feel and in a hurry to make everyone understand what I want and like. Being the youngest of three sisters can do that to you. I was always treated like a kid and I totally enjoyed being one.
Now too, in many ways, I am like that. I am not a very good listener. I understand what people want to say and I understand their feelings. But I just am not a good person to cry with. I don’t know how to sympathize with anyone, in words, in person. I know it makes me sound like a heartless female. I sometimes wonder if I am. I prefer to offer the depth of my feelings only through my silence. Not many are equipped to understand the volumes that this silence can speak.
I read an article about Sagittarians a while ago. I fit that bill to perfection.
She’s not always going to say the kind of things you want to hear. Most of the time, she’ll curl your sideburns with her remarkable, flat statements and her embarrassing questions. But now and then she’ll say something so special and splendid it will make you feel like singing.
I hope I have said something special and splendid to all of you at some point. About the former, I am sure I have. 🙂
Is there any way to change myself? That’s the question I want to put forward to my blogger friends. You all know me through what I brag, boast, whine and share in my space here. But invariably through the months that this interaction continued, I am sure everyone has formed an opinion about the kind of person I am.
The incidences that have occurred in my life over the past two years and more since I started blogging have left me with a void. Void not as in something missing from my life, void as in the lack of knowledge as to the kind of person I have become.
In the melancholy mood that I am today, the only good that came out of it is an ending to a nagging question.
Our friend KParthsarathi had put up a story a few days ago about The Nagging Question. I was encouraged by him to give it an ending that I feel appropriate.
I sat down to write it today and he was kind enough to post it on his blog as a sequel.
This has definitely made my day. KP, you have done something splendid and special for me today. And I am happy to have met you here. Thank you Sir.