It’s really philosophical to say “live in the moment”. Or maybe say “Be happy with what you have”. You really don’t need another pen or phone or laptop or game or a life partner or a life. Just “be happy with what you have”.
I have heard this so many times. Hence, I decided to use it twice in the above paragraph. Seriously, if everyone was truly happy with what they have, would the world progress?
I agree that we should never aim for something that is beyond our reach. But if we don’t, will we ever take the next step in the right direction towards it? Will we learn from mistakes if we don’t make them at all?
If the child demands a mobile instead of a toy, I think we should grant it. Who knows maybe he/she just might design the next super-hit mobile app! That’s what it can lead to. But yes it can lead to a whole lot of negative impact too. Hence, handover the mobile along with a set of instructions or rules. Make a mistake!
If the child demands a break from studies and you deny it, he/she goes back to studies but nothing will ever get through into the brains. After an ample break and rest, the kid might just be able to learn better. Maybe take in more info in 15 minutes, than he/she would have done in an hour. But of course, never let them make a habit of it. Time lost never comes back.
Whatever it is that we do as parents, it is bound to go unnoticed. Unless of course if you sacrifice your entire life just for their well being. But these days, this doesn’t actually apply. Parents bring up kids and try and enjoy a life too. Hence no regrets when the kids fly off after graduation, job or marriage.
Live and let live. Try and understand what they are trying to say. Give them the benefit of the doubt. Give them a chance to make mistakes of their own. How often have you heard parents talk about their children this way?
Children are people too. Although I agree that they are what we make them to a certain extent, I also believe that children should be left to make their own choices. Even if we know the potential danger in them, all we can do is give them the wisdom of our experiences and stand by.
So am I happy in my skin? No. I need to lose weight. I need to find something productive (read make money) to do with my time. I need to make friends. I need to go out and enjoy myself. Maybe share a drink or two with pals. Chat about world issues and not bother about what happens in my house!
My health is not what it should be. The other day, at the ICU, the doc says, “Your risk factor is really low, since no one in your family has had heart issues and since all your tests came out negative and also because you are a woman. The blood count is high and the ECG had slight irregularities. But there is nothing to worry. Your risk factor is only your weight.” And for this professional advice I had to pay the hospital 4000 AED. Just looking at the bill I would have had a heart attack. I am glad the hubby was not around to see that bill. I was admitted because I had shortness of breath and I had chest pains for almost a week prior to that. I couldn’t speak and the mom and sis insisted I get a check up done. I have decided now that I will not go to a doctor until and unless I am on a stretcher. I have lost faith in the lot. They prescribed painkillers and antibiotics (I have no infection) and I have follow up appointments tomorrow. Which I am not going to go for! Who cares any more!
How difficult can it be to live in the moment, you ask? It’s very difficult! If you are a parent, you are always second-guessing your decisions. You are analyzing your previous decisions for any mistakes committed or error in judgment and you are apprehensive of what your kids are learning from you, the school and the media. Raising kids is never a problem. Raising socially responsible kids is the challenge. In this ever changing world, the criteria with which I grew up and unknowingly which I am passing on to my kids, is totally outdated. So I am constantly checking and double-checking everything I do.
I am a cool mom. No, no, don’t smile. I really am! I have given the freedom to my kids to tell me to shut up if I don’t make any sense to them. They have no respect whatsoever for my age, because I act their age most of the time. And they have no value for anything I say. But at the end of the day, they come back to say sorry and give me tight hugs and make me want to cry my heart out. That I guess is totally worth the heartaches (and the shortness of breath).
Will they become responsible adults? I do not know. Will I live long enough to see that they do? I don’t know about that either. But I do know that this is what I call living in the moment. I might not be the best mom in the world, I might not cook them the best of dishes or dress them up perfectly for every occasion and I may not fuss over them, as I should. But I know at the end of the day, that I have done a reasonably good job of bringing them up and for that I shall be forever grateful to God.
So ,yes, I guess I am happy. Are you?