I don’t know if it is my almost shutdown brain speaking or if it’s the truth. But I do think that life is becoming more and more like a series of mistakes.
We at some or the other point in life think that being born to our parents was a mistake. I, for one, was always waiting to find out that I was actually a long lost child who was exchanged during childbirth. And that I would suddenly wake up one day and realize that I am an heiress. The things I wanted to buy with all my inheritance were many!
While in school I discovered that I was not meant to be a part of this cruel world. I was neither a teacher’s pet nor a popular gal. In fact I remember a time when there was a voting for the class monitor and I got just two votes. And no, I hadn’t voted for myself!
Later when I entered teenage I felt that being born the youngest is a mistake. I have two elder sisters, and both of them were married when I was just in the 9th grade. I made it through teenage in the shadow of REAL world problems of my elder sisters. Just a note, teenage problems are never real. Or so I was taught to believe. It’s sad though, that is when your life decisions are made. Yeah, being third in line had its share of disadvantages.
Later, in college I got admission into the wrong branch of Engineering. I think the mistakes I made during college were innumerable. I am not talking about “going to prison” kind of mistakes. I am talking about the mistakes the heart makes, sometimes just by listening to the head.
Married life brought along with it a whole lot of issues that were totally new to me. You would think that with two elder sisters as examples, I would have learnt to have and lead a perfect life. But alas, no two lives are the same and neither are the adventures they face.
Coming to the children I raised, I am not sure where to begin. At times I feel I have done a good job with them, and at times I really wonder how they got to be who they are now. Did I really teach them that? Am I really a good role model for them?
So you see, life is a series of mistakes. What would I have been if I hadn’t made all these mistakes or if these mistakes hadn’t happened to me? Would I be a totally different individual?
Do experiences really change the person who we are? Or does it only change how we view life and its contents?
Do ponder on this issue, while I continue making mistakes. I think I am getting better at it with each passing year.