7 steps to a hell

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As part of the Festival Of Words at Write Tribe.

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A post a day for 7 days this week. Today is the Sixth Day.

7 steps to a hell

Have you wondered how a relationship/ friendship happens? I was just thinking about it today and I thought I will list my process here.

1. Initial hiccup

It takes a long time for me to be able to like someone. It takes much longer than it should.

2. It is all about trust

Once the person is identified as likeable, he/she has to be classified as trustworthy too. Guys can break our heart if we are not careful . Girls on the other hand, can cause us trauma.

3. First move

Whether it is a friendship or a relationship , it is very important who makes the first move. I am nice and friendly with everyone , but I rarely open my heart to people until they have approached me first. Bad idea. I know.

4. I never admit my mistakes

I am a “Do right” person. Like most people are. But sometimes my right may not be your right. Learning of the co existence of varied people species rights and wrongs happened quite late in life. Or you can say, it is still a work in progress.

5. And I expect

Once I accept a friend , I expect complete loyalty. No, not that that person cannot share any other relationship with any other person. I just would like our relationship to be treated with respect. No back biting. No ignoring. And no forgetting important dates like birthdays. Is that too much to ask?

6. I am a clingon

Once I have identified the prey, he/she may want to leave me for any number of reasons. Hey, no one’s perfect. But I will most likely be the last person to understand that I have been let go.

7. The afterward

Once let gone, I expect secrecy. Once a friend turns to be a foe or just an acquaintance again, private details have a way of surfacing. If I was correct in my step 1 and 2 of the analysis process, then this would not be an issue. But if I was wrong, then there is the trauma or the hurt.

Sheesh! I guess this is why I have very few friends in life. Too much work!

Friendship is a very important relationship. Treat it with respect and learn to maintain it. Life will then be smooth sailing. Otherwise friendship will be just another disaster waiting to happen!

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To My Best Friend

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To My Best Friend

LettersUnsent

Letters Unsent

My Dear BFF,

It seems this letter will never reach you. But then I am sure it will find its way to you someday.

Being friends is the first step towards any relationship. I am sure we could have converted that first attraction into something more meaningful than what it finally became. We had the required ingredients for the perfect relationship. We knew what the other was thinking, feeling and hiding. Nothing was a secret between us. We proved to be the best that could happen to each other. We admired, respected and loved each other with all dedication and no compulsion. We were close enough to be termed as soul mates. Then why? Then why did we have to part ways?

What changed? The people, as in you and me? The circumstances, as in the distances between us?  For people who care for each other, there is no room for ego. There is no room for neglect or hurt. There is only pure and total understanding. Where did we go wrong? What did I miss? I know I will never know and I have come to terms with it.

You are and always will be my best friend. No matter where you are, with whom you are, under what circumstances you are, you will always find me just a heart beat away. That’s what friendship means to me. Not the proximity in body, but in soul. I am here for you whenever you need me. If I only knew why I had to lose that place in your life. Why you chose to neglect and hurt me? Why the hurt refuses to go and why the pain refuses to subside.

I am not willing to change who I am and what I am to please you. The idea of friendship is to be accepted as is. Change I will for the people who need a modified version of me. For you, I want to be what I really am. If that changes, then there is no holding ground for this friendship. I guess it is best to let our friendship die a slow death then.

Hopefully, our paths will never cross again. Even if we do meet, it will be like strangers. Which is a reality because I don’t know you anymore. I don’t want a changed version of you either. I am sure I will never get my best friend back again. And I am ready to accept this now.

Out of sight, out of mind, but not out of soul. Yet!

Let’s not meet even in dreams I say,
If you do come, it better be to stay!

The hole in my heart stays ripped and dripping in memory of you…. My friend… My best friend… Forever???

Until time heals, still yours,
Jyothi

Written for Write Tribe’s Letters Unsent .